wtffashionshark

Hallo Readers,

In Sean O’Casey’s wonderful Juno and the Paycock, Captain Boyle remarks ‘the world is in a terrible state o’chassis’. That was written in 1924, set in a traumatised post-independence Dublin. Captain Boyle’s analysis is no less accurate one hundred and one years later. There are murderous dictators like Putin, Xi and Kim Jong Un. The US is led by an ignorant, senile bigot. In Ukraine, thousands are dying daily and European stability is at risk. Gaza has been bombed flat and Benjamin Nethanyu is just itching to get going again. Violent civil war rages in the Sudan. The US is murdering alleged Venezuelan drug traffickers in their little boats in the Caribbean, something that would be a war crime if only there were an actual war; on Wednesday, the US upped the ante by boarding a Venezuelan oil tanker and announcing ‘we’re keeping the oil’. And despite the supposed peace deal brokered by the bloke who got the first-ever FIFA Peace Medal, Thailand and Cambodia are it again.

You might think, therefore, that US Secretary of State, Marco Rubio, had more than enough to think about at the moment. And that is before we get to his other main job as Don Snoreleone’s National Security Adviser. Rubio was obliged to assume this interim role after his predecessor, hapless Mike Walsh, included a journalist in a group chat on Signal about bombing the Houthis. You remember that one – when idiot drunk Pete Hegseth, the Secretary of State for War Crimes, was busily messaging everyone about the exact time the bombs would be falling. It is now December and Rubio is still the interim postholder. But what has been Rubio’s number 1 priority this week? Fonts. Yes, you read that right. Fonts. Namely and to whit, the use by the State Department of the Calibri font in its official documents and communications. A few years ago, when the President of the US was someone else and the Secretary of State did not have his head rammed up the Presidential rectum, it was decided to change the departmental font from Times New Roman to Calibri. There were several reasons for this. One was that Microsoft had switched to Calibri as its default font, but also because people with visual disabilities find Calibri easier to read because it is less curly. Rubio decreed that  ‘To restore decorum and professionalism to the Department’s written work products and abolish yet another wasteful DEIA [Diversity, Equity, Inclusion and Accessibility] program, the Department is returning to Times New Roman as its standard typeface. This formatting standard aligns with the President’s One Voice for America’s Foreign Relations directive, underscoring the Department’s responsibility to present a unified, professional voice in all communications’. So there you have it. To hell with people with bad eyesight. So what if the font used by the State Department (for which they pay their taxes) puts out stuff they cannot read? Tough! WE ARE NOT GOING TO BE WOKE!!!! It’s their fault if there is something wrong with their eyesight. Or they should use their Medicare to have an operation…oh….hang on.

That Rubio has turned out to be a snivelling lickspittle is, of course, a surprise to absolutely no one. In 2016, then Senator Rubio condemned his main rival for the Presidential nomination as someone who wet his pants, put on his makeup ‘with a trowel’ and was a ‘conman’. Now in 2025,  that trouser-wetting, orange-coloured con-man is his boss, and Rubio lavishes praise upon him on every occasion, continuing to do so even when Don Snoreleone is nodding off. When Russia first invaded Ukraine, he defended Ukraine to the hilt and emphasised the importance of  US support. Now, he is complicit in strong-arming  Zelenskyy into handing over territory and agreeing to terms set by Russia. Oh, and he claims to be a devout Christian. Rubio has long since ditched principle, something he has been more than prepared to barter in exchange for high office and a shot at the Presidency in 2028. But has he really sunk so low that he is prepared to diss and dismiss measures aimed at making life easier for the disabled because a change of font is ‘woke’? What’s next for the chop? Wheelchair ramps? Heaven forfend that someone who cannot use their legs can get in and out of a public building……

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We start our review of the week’s ghastly garb at the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix with motor racing legend, Sir Lewis Hamilton, wearing Dior.

The jacket looks like one of those frilly loo-roll dollies, but the real horror here are the trousers, which are billowing like full sails in a headwind. You could get his car down one leg and still have room left for a mechanic or two.

Next, we are at the Women in Cinema event at the Red Sea International Film Festival in Jeddah, where we find French actor Juliette Binoche, wearing Gucci.

Blimey. Ozzy Osbourne is risen!!!! And he seems to have grown a sparkly tail………

Still in Saudi, we have actor Dakota Johnson wearing Chloé.

WAIT, SORRY, WHAT? This is happening in SAUDI ARABIA. A country where women have to cover up. Dakota seems to have forgotten that she is in Jeddah, and not Johannesburg, and is clad in lace with a large labial lampshade.

Now we are in at Variety’s 9th Annual Hitmakers Brunch in Los Angeles where we find rapper BigXthaPlug (né Xavier Landum) wearing his stomach.

A bare stomach is not clothes. Indeed, it is the antithesis of clothes. Put it away, for pity’s sake.

This is actor Lupita Nyong’o wearing Chanel at the Chanel Métiers d’Art Show 2026 in New York City.

This is downright unpleasant. Did you know that some birds become so stressed that they rip out their own feathers? That is exactly what the lovely Lupita looks like. Why it would be anyone’s look of choice, WTF cannot say. Call the Royal Society for the Protection of Birds!

Now for two very silly people, actor Timothée Chalamet and his girlfriend, personalitee and makeup multi-millionaire, Kylie Jenner. They are in Los Angeles, publicising Timothée’s latest movie, Marty Supreme; both of them are wearing custom Chrome Hearts.

Apparently the colour orange has some relevance to the plot of the movie, but honestly…. She is not even in it. And orange leather? Really? They look like the love children of an oompah-loopah and President Trump when he cos-played a binman before the 2024 election.

Finally, this is actor Thomasin McKenzie wearing Alexander McQueen at the New York première of Fackham Hall.

Readers will remember when Liz Truss’s premiership was outlasted by a lettuce. Thomasin seems to have disinterred the salad item in question and turned it into a frock.

 This week’s It’s Got to Go comes from WTF aficionado Richard from Reigate, who has brought a disgusting new supermarket concept sandwich to her attention. This one is bad, bad, bad. Meet the Sainsbury’s Mince Pie Brioche Style Wrap.

This is not a dessert. It is the main course of the Sainsbury’s Meal Deal.  It contains mincemeat, shortcake balls and caramel sauce. In a wrap! A wrap! A wrap has as much similarity to a brioche as Nigel Farage does to a decent human being, ie none whatsoever. WTF has not tried it herself but the reviews are not good. What a really revolting idea. Can supermarkets just stop introducing these appalling seasonal culninary tortures? It’s Got to Go.

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Next week will feature the fabled Christmas Turkey Poll where a number of appallingly dressed celebrities will compete for your votes as the worst dressed of the last six months. Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x