WTF Amber Alert Special

Hallo Readers,

Here is the bad news.  Albert Thompson has prostate cancer.

Here is the good news. The NHS has now given him a date in May when he will start radiotherapy.

Here is more bad news.  Thompson, who has suffered from lymphoma for a decade, was diagnosed with prostate cancer and had an operation in January 2017. In November 2017, he went to hospital to start his course of radiotherapy, only to be told that he needed to provide proof of residence or else pay £54,000. Thompson had neither a passport nor the money. Why? Because Thompson is a victim of the change of immigration laws in the 1970’s and further changes in 2014 when David Cameron and Teresa May decided to get tough on illegal immigrants in a bid to stave off a mass defection of voters to UKIP. At the time, they were warned that the new laws would hurt Caribbean and Commonwealth people who came here quite legally at a time when they were not required to apply for indefinite leave to remain and have lived here for decades. But May ploughed ahead and the policy, started by her and carried on by her hapless successor Amber Rudd, a woman who makes Comical Ali look like the fountain of truth, has resulted in people who didn’t even know they were not British, who have spent their whole adult life here, who  have paid taxes and National Insurance here, who have married and had children here, have been threatened with deportation, evicted from their homes, and treated as criminals.

Thompson’s mother came here at the invitation of the British Government in 1966 to work in the NHS as a nurse. Albert followed in 1973 as a young teenager. He went to school here. He worked as a mechanic for thirty years. He paid tax. But because he could not produce his passport to show when he arrived, he was evicted from his home -A MAN WITH CANCER – and denied treatment by the self- same NHS he had paid his taxes for, denied the legal aid he had paid his taxes for and threatened with deportation. It was only after a hell of a fuss that May had to climb down, and now he is to be given the treatment he needs and the indefinite leave to remain he deserves. 

There are many others just like Albert Thompson, respectable, hard working, committed, decent people whose parents were invited here to staff the transport services and the Health Service, many who came on the Windrush as children and who were never warned that without proof of arrival, they could be thrown out of their houses and denied medical treatment and treated like scum – even though the Home Office had destroyed their arrival records, the evidence that they would have needed to remain here untroubled by threatening letters and demands for money they don’t have and the prospect of deportation to places they have no wish to go to because their home is in England. What sort of country have we become, that we are prepared to treat people like this because a few years ago the Tories were so worried about losing votes to a racist party? No one resigns any more. May won’t resign. Rudd won’t resign. No one has enough shame to do that these days. But every citizen of this country should be deeply, deeply, ashamed.


Let us cheer ourselves up with the week’s sartorial shockingness where everyone appears to be in a stage costume. We start with the Ken and Barbie of Washington DC, Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump. Ivanka is wearing a dress by Rodarte which costs $12,800.

No one cares what Jared is wearing unless it is an orange jumpsuit with Department of Corrections written on the back. Barbie is dressed as a souvenir Scarlett O’Hara toilet roll cover. WTF would really like it if they both just went far, far, away.

Next up, we have celebritee and former inamorata of Kanye West, Amber Rose , wearing something very bizarre indeed and Stella McCartney trainers which cost £450.

WTF has trouble in deciding what is the more offensive. The skeleton onesie, the fake nipples, the cameltoe or the fact that anyone would pay £450 for a pair of hideous trainers. This outfit is a real stinkeroony.

Next up, singer Lenny Kravitz wearing Chanel. Chanel!!!!!!!!

This might have passed muster in the Casbah in 1972. MIGHT have. Someone forgot to hem his trewsies and those shoes are plain nasty.

To the Tribeca Film Festival where we encounter actor Ansel Elgort wearing Alexander McQueen and model Suki Waterhouse wearing Dior.

Ansel’s suit is beautifully cut and the colour is great but those trainers are giving WTF a migraine and he looks like he has a couple of toy boats on his feet. As for Suki’s Dior creation, WTF once made a macrame plant holder just like it. She has been wondering where it had got to…

Here is singer Rihanna wearing Y/Project.

WTF aficionado Joanne Morley was incensed at the sight of Rihanna wrapped up in what looks like the Turin Shroud compete with nipple activity and perfectly preposterous boots. Joanne says “What is wrong with her leg? She looks deformed, has she got a toddler strapped to her hip underneath her designer hessian sackcloth?”.

Finally, Orange is the New Black actress Dascha Polanco wearing – well, who can say what the hell this is?

Yurgle. And the rear view is even worse… 

As you know, Readers, criticism is alien to WTF’s nature but Dascha looks like a sack of shit. It is not just the arse cheeks, although arse cheeks are to be deplored. If Elmo from Sesame Street went to a fancy dress party dressed as tap-dancing chorus girl, this is what he would look like.


This week’s It’s Got To Go comes from WTF stalwart Andrew Purcell and not only because his point is a good one. But it permits WTF to say

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANDREW!!!! With love and kisses from your many fans….

Andrew has brought this nonsensical food poncification to WTF’s attention, courtesy of We Want Plates….

No. NO. NO!!!!!!!!! Some sort of raspberry jelly served on a sanitary pad is enough to put anyone off their food. WTF likes a laugh as well as the next person but this is just plain revolting. What bloody hell is this?

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Keep sending in your top comments and your excellent suggestions for It’s Got To Go. Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x









This entry was posted in Amber Rudd, Celebrity, Celebrity Fashion Disasters, Chanel, Coachella, Fashion, Immigration, Politics, Theresa May, UKIP, Uncategorized, Windrush, Worst Dressed Celebrities and tagged , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to WTF Amber Alert Special

  1. *The Tories are doing something horrible to prevent defections to a racist political party.
    I guess trashing the racist political party is just not in their playbook. Are they really that hard up for voters?
    By the way, I miss Comical Ali. A half a century ago somebody that odd would have been a recurring character on “Hogan’s Heroes”.
    *A celebrity famous for having sex with somebody famous is wearing an obnoxiously bizarre outfit.
    *Ivanka and Jared. Some days I miss the Kardashians.
    *Lenny Kravitz wearing the tarpaulin that I used as a motorcycle cover.
    *The lady wearing the macrame plant holder.
    *So far, everything I’ve come to expect on a Friday morning. And then the lightning started to hit…
    *Rihanna dressed as a comic book lady superhero (or supervillain), right down to the pose. All that’s missing is the ray gun on her hip and the electron whip in her hand. ZAAAAP!
    Summer Stinker material.
    *I do have to argue against the proposition that arse cheeks are deplorable. Arse cheeks, at least those of the human female, are to be celebrated in all their infinite variety.
    But Dascha Polanco’s cheeks are kind of spilling out of the red “Tickle Me Elmo” suit to the point of leaving a wake as they cruise down the sidewalk. If this costume was an oil tanker it would be a major ecological disaster.
    *And special thanks for the birthday wishes.

  2. trishashannongmailcom
    Trisha says:

    The Elmo suit has got to be a summer stinker. It might not be so bad if it fit, but how could it, because what is it? Happy birthday, Andrew!

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