wtffashionshark

Hallo Readers,

There was no WTF last week because it was Jewish New Year.  WTF did her usual big dinner for family and friends. The meal traditionally begins with prayers over the bread and wine and then a piece of apple is dipped into honey and we ask the Almighty that it should be His will that this be a good and sweet New Year. We asked Him that last year as well, but it wasn’t, was it?  Only days after we feasted on our apple and honey, the terrible events of 7 October 2023, when 1800 men, women and children were murdered in their homes and at a music festival, and hostages taken, led to more terrible events in Gaza and tens of thousands of deaths, and now there are thousands of deaths in Lebanon as well. There appears to be no end in sight, only an expectation that everything will get worse.

Meanwhile, Ukraine is in danger not just of being overrun, but of being abandoned by the US, previously a stalwart of the fight against Putin and Russian aggression. Except suddenly in the US, the right, who used to hate communism with a vengeance, and who happily attack everyone and anyone with any social conscience as a communist, a Marxist or a socialist, as well as a fascist, has developed a crush on Vladimir and is minded to abandon Volodymyr and spend the money on tax cuts for billionaires instead. Apropos of which, the Republican candidates for President and Vice President have added a new lie to their already extensive repertoire, namely that the Democrat President and the Democrat candidate for President have been stealing the money put aside for victims of natural disasters, like the ones currently ravaging Florida, Georgia and the Carolinas, and spending it on illegal immigrants intent upon eating their new neighbours’ pets. And what is so depressing is that people either believe it, and don’t apply for the help for which they are eligible, or don’t believe it but don’t care. And even those Republican congressmen senators and governors who have condemned the misinformation, which is coward-speak for lies, have failed to call out Trump and Vance by name and continue to actively support their election in November. As Barack Obama asked last night, when did that become OK?

Here in the UK, the promised government by grown-ups and truth tellers continues to go to tits up. On top of FlatGate and GarmentGate and SpectacleGate and TaylorSwiftGetsAPoliceEscortwhileCabinetMinistersgetFreeConcertTicketsGate, there is  IncreasedTaxesAheadForSomePoorBuggersDespitePromisestotheContraryGate while the Prime Minister’s popularity has fallen so low that it can only be detected by cavers. Not that the Tories are offering anything more palatable, with the battle for Leader of His Majesty’s Opposition coming down to a contest between Robert Jenrick, the man who set next to a billionaire at a Tory party dinner and then used his influence as Minister of Housing to save the said billionaire a fortune in planning costs, and Kemi Badenoch,  who makes Liz Truss look like Owen Jones, and who cannot open her mouth without placing her Russell & Bromley loafers into it. We are all going to hell in a handcart, but at least as we trundle towards it, last night we could look up and see the Northern Lights, even in Islington.

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We begin our review of the week’s sartorial slurry with the Duchess of Sussex, aka Meghan Markle, at a fundraiser in Los Angeles wearing Carolina Herrera.

Apparently this used to have a train, but Megs recycled it by getting rid of the train and donning a demure demeanour. Frankly, she should have kept the train and wrapped it round the bodice because those tits look totally terrible, as if she suffers from inverted nipples, while the sandals make her look as if she has enormous feet.

Next up, we are the Veuve Cliquot Polo Classic in Pacific Palisades, California, where we encounter actor Charles Melton wearing Saint Laurent and Evan Kinori shoes.

That suit is St Laurent? Was there a power failure at the atelier? The jacket is simultaneously too short and too big and the trousers are tragic, like Charlie Chaplin shortchanged by his tailor. And he seems to have borrowed grandpa’s slippers…

Now we are in New York City where we find actor Sarah Paulson wearing Bottega Veneta.

Whoever did Sarah’s makeup should be given a slap, a P45 and another slap, because she looks like Bette Davis in Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? As for the outfit, it was last seen on Western heroine and shooting queen, Annie Oakley.

We are now at Paris Fashion Week where Louis Vuitton displayed his wares, including on actor Alicia Vikander.

She is wearing a shower curtain. That is all there is to be said about Alicia.

And still in Paris, here is singer Hayley Williams wearing Stella McCartney.

Oh, do go away, you silly woman….. WTF’s only consolation is that it was really cold that day so Hayley would have been freezing and well punished for her idiocy. 

We are now back in New York for the Time100 Next Gala 2024 and rapper Vince Staples wearing who came even say what this is?

More like Wince Staples. Did he grow out of the raincoat and decide to keep it as a jacket? Did he cut Inspector Gadget in half? #baffled

Meet actor Naomi Scott wearing Erdem.  

Love the jacket and the shirt. Hate the silly little skirt and the chandelier worn as an overskirt. And the knee-socks.

And she’s back!! After a lengthy absence, here is Z lister and former WAG Lizzie Cindy wandering around Los Angeles. Mind how you go…..

If a candy floss had an epic outbreak of camel toe, this is what it would look like. Yurgle.

This week’s It’s Got To Go comes from WTF aficionado WTF from Islington who seems to have spent much of the week trying not to kill moronic pedestrians crossing the road whilst glued to their mobile phones and not bothering to observe the basics of road safely, like fucking looking where they are going.

WHY??? What is so crucially important that they risk death rather than look up from their screens? Is it a message from their partners to pick up some Prosecco and a packet of pork scratchings? A pithy point made by Elon Musk on X? JUST. STOP. IT. It’s Got to Go.  

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Keep your tip top comments coming through and your splendid suggestions for It’s Got To Go. Let us meet again next Friday, Be good x