wtffashionshark

Hallo Readers,

It’s a funny thing, freedom of speech. Everyone wants their own, and that of others who say things they agree with; but many are pretty quick to demand that others be stopped from expressing views they do not like. The US is a prime example of this. That insufferable prick, JD Vance, came over to Europe and hectored us all on the lack of free speech; he was very critical of the UK banging up a woman for the minor matter of calling Moslems to be burnt to death, and of Germany for seeking to outfox the neo-Nazi party gaining traction there. This week, the Rancid Kumquat and Mrs Kumquat called for the immediate dismissal of comedian Jimmy Kimmel for cracking a joke about Mrs Kumquat sporting the glow of someone soon to be a widow – which he said BEFORE the alleged assassination attempt of the President, in reference to the 25 year age gap between the spouses. Not that the assailant got to even the same floor as the Kumquats, but before you knew it, there were calls for Democrats to tone down the hateful rhetoric which was putting prominent Republicans in danger. 

Here in the UK, Keir Starmer has achieved the remarkable distinction of being labelled “Kiddie Starver” by those appalled by his support of Israel’s attacks on Gaza and “Jew Harmer” by some of the Jewish Community in North London, who booed him roundly when he pitched up in Golders Green after two Jewish men were stabbed on Wednesday. The first victim, in his 30’s, was wearing a yarmulke. He was just walking along the street. The second, a man in his 70’s, was wearing the beard and large hat sported by orthodox Jewish men. He was just standing at a bus stop. The assailant was tasered, kicked in the head when he would not drop the knife he was holding, and carted away. It has subsequently emerged that (i) he has mental health issues (ii) that he was on the terror watchlist and (iii) he had previous. Who watches these people on the watch list? It is a pity that no-one watched him travelling to Golders Green armed with a knife and intent on mayhem. Many Jews have been warning that the attacks on them, their synagogues and their properties, would continue until the police stepped up their protection, stopped allowing pro-Palestinian marchers to shout “From the River to the Sea” and “Globalise the Intifada”, and indeed banned these marches altogether. Now they have had enough, as witnessed by the angry demonstrations yesterday. They are angry and they are also scared.

WTF is also angry and scared. She has a mezzuzah on her front door. She has put on the stab-proof vest and has patrolled outside her synagogue. As a Jew, she believes that she is entitled to the same protection as everyone else who lives here, whatever their religion, whatever their race, and whatever their political affiliation. And she is appalled that, exercising the freedom of speech they so cherish for themselves, so many other people who live here are absolutely cool about attacks on Jews. We had it coming. If Israel stopped attacking Gaza/Iran/other, this would not happen. The man walking down the street did not fly a B52 over Gaza. The elderly man at the bus stop did not bomb hospitals and schools. The men praying in Manchester on Yom Kippur were not Israelis. WTF is not Israeli. But we have to suffer increasing numbers of attacks on us. How dare we complain that we feel threatened because of a country we do not live in, do not vote in, and, in many cases, do not agree with? We are apparently complicit, and even if we are not, we are Jews; and Jews are always complaining that anti-Zionism is antisemitism (which WTF does not actually agree with), and so apparently we brought it on ourselves.  No, WTF would not stop people marching in protest against Israel. She does believe that “From the River to the Sea” and “Globalise the Intifada” does refer to eliminating Israel, but people are entitled to call for the end to the Israeli state. What they should not be allowed to do is to countenance, or excuse, or glorify or celebrate the murder and attempted murder and constant harassment of a section of the community that lives here and which  happens to share the religion of the Jewish State. Because that IS antisemitism.

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To other matters.  We need cheering up.

We start our review of the week’s clothing catastrophes at the Disney Company’s Emmy Season Toast to TV with actor Chris Perfetti wearing Issy Miyake.

Was it cold, despite the sunshine? Chris seems to be wearing thermal ribbed jim-jams.

Also there was actor Lucy Halliday (Daisy in the excellent The Testaments), wearing Chloé.

First, those pale pastels are so not on Lucy’s colour wheel. Second, the alleged skirt is disclosing some rather red kneecaps. And third, the combination of the alleged skirt and the duster coat worn around her elbows makes her look as if she is emerging from a bundle of bedlinen.

Next to the Jeonju Film Festival in South Korea, where we encounter actor Greta Lee wearing Dior.

It is another bundle of laundry, only this time, it is split to the crotch and bedecked with padron peppers.

Now we are at the Time 100 Gala in New York City. One of the honoured 100 Most Influential People 2026 was K-Pop singer Jennie Kim, wearing Schiaparelli.

So here we have a belt that is as much use of as an ashtray on a motorbike, an exposed belly-button, an imminent Minge Moment, and grey rabbits’ ears serving as a bodice. Yurgle.

Still in NYC, here is actor and comedian Ayo Edebiri (WTF loves her in The Bear), wearing Chanel.

Yes, you DID read that right. Chanel. A white shirt with nothing underneath except a pair of tights, and Elmo the muppet wrapped around her to ward off the chill.

We are back in LA for the première of Apple TV’s Widow’s Bay, starring actor Matthew Rhys.

WHAT THE FUCK ARE THOSE BOOTS? If, 15 years on, Anthony, Viscount Bridgerton, went paddling in the pond in his country estate wearing his new wellies, this is what he would look like.

We move across town to The Billboard Women in Music Awards. This is singer Nezza. WTF has no idea what she is wearing. None whatsoever.

This is the world’s ugliest bra, reminiscent of the 1950’s when Doris Day and other such sported very pointy titties under cashmere twinsets. It is attached to a silvery sack, like a demented posh school sports’ day. And why is she wearing a dead ferret around her neck?

And finally, this is singer Tyla, wearing Javier Collazo.

How many birds died to make this number? It gives the expression “a murder of sparrows” a whole new meaning.

And that is not the worst of it. Mind how you go with this one…. Just saying.

Even WTF, who looks at this stuff every week, yelped like a scalded cat on catching sight of this expanse of flesh. And then she kept on yelping, leaving her cleaner in a quandary whether to dial 999. Until she saw the picture in question, at which point she joined in the yelping……

This week’s It’s Got to Go comes from WTF aficionado Yvonne from Jedburgh, who was appalled, and then appalled some more, by this woolly thing that she found online. It would certainly keep you warm – except for your knees of course and expanse of thigh. 

Yvonne writes : “As you know, I live in a part of the world where the wind can chill you to the bone, but it doesn’t matter how low the mercury falls; you’d never catch me in this. It’s just bloody ludicrous. It came up on my Pinterest while I was searching for winter woollies!” She is quite correct.  It’s Got to Go.

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Keep sending in your top comments and your excellent suggestions for It’s Got to Go. Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x.