wtffashionshark

Hallo Readers,

Yesterday was Thanksgiving, which was said to be the deadline for Ukraine to accept a 28-point plan supposedly drawn up by the State Department and incorporating suggestions and concessions from both Ukraine and Russia with a view to securing a peace settlement. However, badly rendered into English with the aid of Google Translate, the plan proved to be pure Kremlin, something which was obvious from both the syntax and the content. Basically, it provided that Ukraine should abandon all hope of joining NATO or the European Union, should shrink its army until it could fit into three or four burnt-out Russian trucks, and should hand over large tracts of land to the invader. This is despite the fact that some of it had not actually been invaded yet, but which would provide a direct route to Kiev when Putin wants to renew hostilities. The only thing that it apparently did not demand was that President Zelenskyy hang himself from a lamppost in Independence Square. Zelenskyy refused to go along with it and was promptly labelled as ‘ungrateful’ by President 47. Fortunately, the European Union, UK and Canada weighed in, at which Russia waxed indignant. 47 then admitted that this document was not his final offer. Because he still sees no difference between buying a piece of real estate in Manhattan and settling a war. In the former case, person A sells person B something which person A either owns, or has the permission of the owner to act on his behalf. In the latter case, country A has been invaded by Country B and is trying to reclaim land that has been stolen from it.

Further evidence of America’s partiality came from a leaked telephone call between a Russian bigwig and 47’s Special Envoy, Steve Witkoff, a man with no experience of diplomacy and foreign policy; he is a property developer from New York and 47’s golf partner. Because nothing prepares you for dealing with a murderous dictator and hundreds of years of complex geopolitical shenanigans, than playing eighteen holes with an ignoramus in sunny Florida. Witkoff is in awe of Putin and believes he is a good man who wants peace. He has also said that because various regions of Ukraine are Russian speaking, their inhabitants must want to be Russian citizens. Much as 47 seems to believe that people who speak English in Canada must want to be American citizens, although how the French speaking Quebeçois fit into that analysis is anybody’s guess. In any event, the c**tstruck Witkoff was recorded advising his Russian mate how best to schmooze 47, basically by telling him how wonderful he is, and how everything he does is wonderful, prior to metaphorically removing his trousers and pleasuring him to order. And the advice certainly worked; as Zelenskyy was flying to Washington to persuade 47 to sell him some Tomahawk jets, Putin was on the phone to 47, whispering the requisite sweet nothings into his miraculously healed ear (WTF had her pierced ears sewn up again 40 years ago, and you can still see the scars – just saying). When Zelenskyy finally got inside the gilded knocking shop that is now the Oval Office, he found that the previously amenable President had changed his mind – again.

The joint discovery of the origin of the so-called peace plan and Witkoff’s sliminess has caused even some Republicans, who have swallowed every Presidential outrage to date, to call for better support for Ukraine and for the Special Envoy to walk the plank. Neither is presently on the cards; it remains to be seen how Zelenskyy, with the support of Western leaders, will hold out against the tourniquet of pressure applied to his country. It is doubtless a coincidence that another deadline, namely nominations for the 2026 Nobel Peace Prize, close at the end of January.

*****************************************************************************

We start our review of the week’s abysmal attire in London at the premiere of Ella McCay with actor Emma Mackey, wearing Loewe.

The jacket is great, but for reasons best known to Emma and to the design team at Loewe, it has been teamed with a mustard table runner. 

Now we are off to the Grand Prix in Las Vegas, where celebritees gathered more for the photo opportunities than for the motorcars. Among them was former member of boyband One Direction, Louis Tomlinson, with his new girlfriend, Love Island contestant and TV presenter, Zara McDermott.

Just when you thought Juicy Couture lay buried, Louis has distinterred it and pitched up in head to toe velour, the colour of sewage sludge, like a poor man’s version of Jennifer Lopez circa 2007.

Also parading about was superstar Beyoncé, wearing  Louis Vuitton, and her errant spouse, Jay Z.

Think of Bey as Lewis Hamilton with tits. That outfit is hideously unflattering and it is so tight around the crotch that she will be reaching for the Canesten. Jay Z’s trousers are billowing like a galleon under sail – and why does he have a turd on his head? But it gets worse. Here they are again, with Bey wearing red vinyl Ferrari with a matching flasher mac. Jay Z is in the same outfit as before, but he seems to have ditched the turd.

#ridiculous. WTF hates people wearing sunglasses at night almost above all things. Bey is kitted out in another crotch-squishing leather romper, worn with sheer, shiny, tights, and the world’s ugliest follow-me-home-and-fuck-me shoes. As for the Grand Prix chequered flag handbag – wave it goodbye.

We move to New York and actor Emilia Jones wearing Louis Vuitton.

Emilia is very pretty, but even she cannot justify this beach cover-up with a Minge Merkin and plenty of groin a-go-go.

Now we travel to Athens and meet Kimberley Guilfoyle, the new US Ambassador to Greece. Heaven knows what she is wearing, but it is as tawdry and tacky as everything else she wears.

Kimberley was once married to the now Governor of California, and potential Democratic Presidential candidate, Gavin Newsom. Her only qualification for being made an Ambassador is that she is the former fiancée of Donald Jr, son of President 47, although more than a decade older than him. After a lengthy engagement, he dumped her for a younger woman.  Something had to be done with Kimberley, who knew where the bodies were buried. Solution – make her the Envoy to Greece, where her idea of diplomacy to flash her tits in a see-through concoction at a Thanksgiving Dinner only a month into her tenure. Fortunately she is wearing large knickers, a veritable lacy Captain Underpants. This one will end badly, mark WTF’s words.

Finally, we are in Sydney for the Aria Awards. This is American country singer, Kasey Musgraves, wearing Georges Hobeika.

Georges Hobeika?!?!?!? This falls squarely into the category of That’s Not Even Clothes. She looks as if she is about to jump out of a cake, like Debbie Reynolds in Singing in the Rain.

 This week’s It’s Got to Go comes from WTF aficionado K.T. from Washington State in the US. Happy Thanksgiving, KT! She sent the picture on the right to WTF on wtffashionshark.bsky.social with the words “submitted without comment”.  You can see why.

It seems that Zac is the new face of Dior Men, but if this is what being a Dior Man looks like, he should have turned dowen the gig. The outfit on the left is like a turtleneck chest bandage. The outfit on the right makes him look like an ice dancer. He also appears to have been dipped whole in a vat of stewed tea. It‘s Got to Go.

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Please keep sending in your top suggestions for It’s Got to Go, as well as your comments, which WTF much enjoys. You can follow her on @wtffashionshark.bsky.social. Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x