Hallo Readers, 

You can be married to a British citizen, give birth to British children, own three magnificent houses in the UK (not to mention a California beachside home) and live in a Government building set aside for those who are  supposed to run the country – and yet, while you are obliged to pay taxes on any income you have in the UK, you pay diddly squat on your income outside the UK, which is a serious loss to the Exchequer because your income outside the UK has been estimated at some £11 million a year. And you also get to avoid inheritance tax on the death of your parents, which again is a serious loss to the Exchequer because your father is a billionaire and your share of whatever he’s got is on the large side of extremely large. So what if you’ve lived here for nine years? Register as a Non Dom for the trifling sum of £30,000 a year and you are exempt from the rules that govern ordinary residents. Many may think that if they could legally avoid paying tax, they would. The problem here is that the person depriving the Exchequer of this money is none other than the wife of the Chancellor of the Exchequer. Whoops.

No one was surprised that Rishi Sunak’s wife Akshata Murthy was availing herself of a tax advantage. This Government has not lost its moral compass because it never had one. If there is a trough, there will  be a minister or a ministerial spouse or family member with their snouts shoved inside it. Murthy is of course entitled to avoid tax, but just because you can does not mean that you should.  She is not popping over for the occasional  holiday -she has lived here for nine years. Her husband has dreams of becoming Prime Minister, although those dreams now seem fanciful. WTF would have preferred Murthy to have waved two fingers at the public rather than issuing a mealy-mouthed and misleading statement suggesting that her Indian citizenship and birthplace governed her tax status. Indian citizenship is irrelevant to Non Dom status; it does not come to you, you go to it – with a cheque for £30,000 and a great deal of expensive advice from Messers That’s Mine, Now Bugger Off LLP. 

Last month Sunak’s Spring Statement failed to help those who do not have £30,000 to give HMRC and who are now facing astronomical fuel rises and cannot sleep for worrying how they will feed their kids, not to mention themselves and the Department of Health stopped giving out free Covid lateral flow tests. This week the Government hoiked up the cost of National Insurance despite Johnson’s promise in 2019 that he would not increase taxes. While pensioners huddle under blankets and families live off food banks, it was no comfort to them to know that the Chancellor’s wife was acting legally.  At 7 pm on Friday night Murthy said that she would pay tax on overseas income in this country after all – doubtless in an attempt to save her husband’s career. It may well be too late…..

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Our review of the week’s clothing crapulence is all from the Grammys which were held last Sunday in Las Vegas, starting with singer Tayla Parx dressed as a wankersaurus.

Er…… WTF’s adored great nephew and niece would go crazy for an outfit like this, but they are aged 5 and 3 respectively. Tayla is 28. Further, while WTF has no great expertise in palaeontology, she doubts whether dinosaurs had arses like that, or wore studded pom-poms in their hair, probably because they did not have any hair. 

Actor and singer Jared Leto wearing Gucci.

It as if the Sheriff of Nottingham moonlighted as a lingerie model for Victoria’s Secrets. Meanwhile, WTF has long made clear her views on white boots – no. No. NO. 

Singer Carrie Underwood wearing Dolce & Gabbana. 

In the interests of bringing culture to the naffs, someone is remaking Pride and Prejudice using the Jumanji characters. Mudboy is cast as Elizabeth Bennett, and here she is having arrived at Netherfield with a dirty petticoat to the great disapprobation of Mr Bingley’s sisters. “Yes, and her petticoat; I hope you saw her petticoat, six inches deep in mud, I am absolutely certain; and the gown which had been let down to hide it, not doing its office.”

Award-winner on the night, singer Jon Batiste, wearing Gucci.

A sparkling Harlequin in crocodile boots. Yurgle.

Japanese Breakfast aka Michelle Zauner wearing Valentino.

This is more Dog’s Breakfast than Japanese Breakfast. If a forsthyia went to a fancy dress party as a plate of scrambled eggs, this is what it would look like….. 

Record producer Benny Blanco wearing who knows what?

Benny has modelled his look on John Malkovich in Dangerous Liaisons. Except that John’s trousers did not hang forlornly above his ankles, he did not wear Mexican peasant bootees and he did not have embroidered saddlebags.

Singer H.E.R. wearing Dundas.

This seems to be the lovechild of Hyperion and a banana.

Rapper Jidenna wearing his granny’s curtains. And ombre boots.

It is to be hoped that Granny was doing her house up and throwing these out after 5o years of good service. It would be unconscionable were Jidenna to have nicked them, even in the name of recycling, leaving  the old dear exposed to daylight and the prying eyes of her neighbours.

Singer Cailin Russo wearing an old armchair.

The outfit is an excrescence, composed of the offcuts from Furniture Village; and the combination of the pale green hair and orange leather puts WTF in mind of a tree frog.

And finally, we have singer Justin Bieber wearing a Balenciaga suit AND Balenciaga Crocs.

What a total knob. Kudos to WTF aficionado Dan from Stevenage who let WTF know that Justin’s preposterous look, minus the neon pink beanie hat and Crocs, is straight out of the old Tom Hanks movie, Big.

This week’s It’s Got To Go comes from WTF aficionado Bindy from Wiltshire who was aghast to discover this dress recommended by the Daily Telegraph as the perfect dress in the perfect colour for any occasion….. it is by Voyager London and costs £260.

 Bindy disagrees with the premise of the article. She says  ‘Perfect?? This is the sort of dress that makes anyone except the skeletally thin feel terrible. If you are channeling your inner Ma Larkin then this dirigible in slime green is just the thing’. Agreed. It’s Got to Go.

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Please keep those comments coming in – there were NONE last week and WTF came over all funny as a result. Oh, and do not neglect your excellent suggestions for It’s Got To Go.  Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x