wtffashionshark

Hallo Readers,

Thomas Mair is a white supremacist, although he is superior to no-one. He is an unemployed gardener who is obsessed with Nazis, virulently anti-semitic and he hates anyone who is not white and British. In June this year, a week before the Brexit vote, he stabbed Jo Cox MP 15 times and shot her in the head with a sawn-off shotgun. For good measure he stabbed a man aged 77 who bravely tried to intervene. Happily, the man survived. As he attacked them, a 5 foot woman and a pensioner, he shouted “Put Britain First”.  He was arrested 5 minutes later with the bloodstained weapons in his holdall but has never said a word about his crimes. In the magistrates court, he gave his name as Death to Traitors. He entered no plea and so there had to be a trial and those traumatised men and women who witnessed the incident and the victim’s bereaved family had to relive it all over again. Mair neither gave nor called evidence. After the verdict, this fascist, cowardly piece of shit asked to make a court statement but was refused. He will now languish in prison at public expense for the rest of his life.  

The last MP to be murdered was Ian Gow, blown up in 1990 by the IRA. Whole life terms are not handed down very often. The events at the Old Bailey on Wednesday were therefore remarkable and most papers had the story on their front page, taking the lead from the Police and calling Mair a Nazi and a terrorist. But those papers who spent the Brexit campaign decrying foreigners and lefties, who trumpeted the importance of Britain governing itself and regaining its sovereignty and repelling the hordes stealing our jobs and our homes and our children’s education, who lauded Nigel Farage when he spoke about hospital beds full of visitors with HIV,  who cheered the UKIP poster showing thousands of migrants with the words “Breaking Point”, unveiled on the self-same day Jo Cox was assassinated, those who turned the air toxic by vomiting forth their poisonous hatred, who dismissed the suggestion at the time that this had anything to do with Brexit or that Mair had shouted “Put Britain First”  – those papers were very quiet about what might have prompted the killing. The Mail, spewer-forth-in-chief, put the story on page 30. Page 30! A woman in a bikini from I’m a Celebrity was deemed bigger news than the sentence imposed on the man who slaughtered his MP in the town square. Not content with that, the Bile actively courted sympathy for Mair. He was “mentally ill” although  he was fit to stand trial. He was “a loner”, as if all single men and women run about armed to the teeth intent upon homicide. Based upon the word of his step-father’s half-sister, the Bile speculated that he “may” have killed Jo Cox because he feared, “perhaps wrongly”, he would be kicked out of his 3 bedroom council house with migrants moving in, and that she would not help him. Not that any migrants were moving in or that he asked for her help. Whereupon the pond life who swallow this stuff whole unleashed their hatred, the same hatred to be found on social media and on the airwaves. Of course it was not a political killing, the poor man just wanted to stay in his home. He needs medical help. Jo Cox was an activist and a do-gooder. She was a Remainer. There is something very fishy about her widower. The left are leeching onto her death to try and frustrate Brexit. Mair was being unduly punished for attacking the establishment.

It makes WTF sick to her stomach. In this ugly, febrile, horrible year of 2016, there have been many low points, God knows. But even worse than the killing of that decent woman in June, even worse than the devastation wrought upon her spouse and her children and her parents and her sister, is the realisation that you can murder someone in cold blood and because you are white and shout “Britain First” whilst you do it, some people will seek to excuse it and that one of the country’s main newspapers will provide them with the materials to excuse him whilst shuffling the story to the back and abrogating its own responsibility. For shame.

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Let us change tack before WTF does herself a mischief, and gawp instead at the week’s fashion faux pas. Here we are in Las Vegas at the Latin Grammys, with singer Jennifer Lopez wearing Zuhair Murad.

Why would you wear something that makes you look as if you have forgotten to get a Brazilian? 

Meet singer Melizza Samaniego, wearing Larissa Couture.

Melizza seems to have come to the Red Carpet straight from cheerleading practice. Her top is a mangled dental tunic and she is at risk of strangling herself with all that gold frogging.

This is baseball player, Aroldis Chapman, wearing who knows what. 

Swathed in tinfoil and positively oven-ready. Does he own an iron? Those trousers are on the sad side of very, very sad.

We welcome back Cameroonian singer Dencia, wearing something horrible (again).

Dencia describes herself on Twitter as “A simple girl with a dream” but this is a nightmare. It is extremely snug and is also whirlier and shinier than an amble through a hallucinogenic meadow. But what upsets WTF more than anything is the bra, whose straps have been wound around Dencia’s neck rather than around her back, a departure from the usual practice.

These are siblings Khloë Kardashian (left) and Kourtney Kardashian (right) at the Angel Ball in NYC, wearing Yousef al Jasmi and Balmain respectively. 

This was a cancer charity event in honour of their father Robert, who died of the disease, And his daughters turn up dressed like a pair of bedraggled doxies. Khloe’s creation is inspired by one of those pre-lit silver twig Christmas trees whilst Kourtney’s has been mauled by a particularly ill-tempered guard dog.

Now we go to the ARIAS in Sydney for a couple of shockers. First, singer Charli XCX wearing who knows that and Prada shoes. Love the shoes.

This is more of a tennis dress than a dress and WTF hates the dingly dangly. But worse is to come….

Here is a WTF rule. If your bum shows under your dress, there is something wrong with your dress.

More nonsense on singer Tove Lo wearing a dress designed by her stylist Crap Diem. Yes, really.

Tove said of her dress, “I’m from Sweden where we don’t really censor at all… you’ve just got to say what it is.” Tove, if we wanted to see your reproductive equipment, which we do not, we would accompany you on your next trip to the gynaecologist.

Back to Blighty and reality “star” Chloe Khan, wearing a bandage and a duster coat by House of CB. 

Camel toe and a tit harness. Not that those are tits. They are more like a couple of uncooked steak and kidney puddings. 

More nastiness at the American Music Awards in the shape of former model and TV presenter Heidi Klum, wearing Wolk Morais.

Like an explosion in a gift-wrap factory. Next!

Next is actress and producer Lauren Giraldo, wearing who knows what.

This outfit can best be described as Wonder Woman on the way to her wedding. The fanny fan is definitely to be deplored.

Finally, and hideously, we have model Chrissy Teigen wearing Yousef Akbar. WARNING!!!! 

AND HERE IS A WARNING TO GO WITH THE FIRST WARNING!!!! MAJOR MINGE ALERT!!!!

Chrissy apologised on Twitter for the hooha in showing her hooha and also thanked her laser technician. Memo to Chrissy. Your dress was slashed to the waist, you were not wearing underwear and you just happened to have had your hooha lasered the previous day. No-one thinks this was an accident. 

This week’s It’s Got To Go ties in with the opening rant and so needs little expansion. It comes courtesy of WTF aficionado Philippa Charles who nominated The Mail for its vile Mair (non) coverage this week, never mind for the usual body shaming, hysterical pro-Faraging etc. She’s right. It’s Got To Go.