wtffashionshark

Hallo Readers,

It has been quite a week for Zack Polanski. As in a shocker of a week. It started on Sunday, when the Green Party Conference  passed a motion declaring that Zionism should be treated as any other form of racism, and rejected the two State solution in favour of one State solution with equal rights for all. Only when the vote was taken, and passed by 1,022 to 813, Polanksi was not there, and has been roundly criticised by his own MPs for it. It ended early this morning when he failed to win the Holborn and St Pancras by-election, the seat vacated by Sir Keir Starmer (remember him?) by 3,000 votes, after which the hapless Polanski has been obliged to do the media rounds, justifying both his stewardship of the Party and his failure to win the seat. The blog is late this morning because WTF was waiting to hear Polanksi on the Today programme at 08:10, which is the time it normally comes out.

The Greens explicitly rejected an amendment that the motion “shall not be used to pressure, proscribe or discipline members based on affiliation with Jewish community institutions, such as synagogues, community centres or denominational groups, that describe themselves as Zionist.” Polanski now says he would not have supported the motion because it was not for the Greens to decide statehood for other countries, but repeatedly refused to answer the question whether he supported a two State solution, save that he wanted to see Jews and Palestinians to have equal rights, and that he could not support a State which murdered civilians and children. He says that he did not attend the vote because the people of Holborn and St Pancras wanted to see him on their doorsteps, and it was Labour’s fault for timing the by-election only days after the Party Conference. He assured people that he would ensure that Jews would not be expelled because of their faith. Which rather begs the question why Jews would feel safe in a party which would condemn them for attending Zionist synagogues. What the fuck is a Zionist synagogue? And how does someone tell from the outside whether it is a Zionist synagogue? Does the synagogue have to hang a disclaimer on its building, a sort of anti yellow star? Speaking as a Jew who had to put on a stab-proof vest and patrol in the dark outside her synagogue as 2,000 people prayed inside on Yom Kippur, WTF finds this sort of language frightening. Speaking as a citizen, she finds the denial of a group of members the right to practice their faith disgusting and unlawful. Speaking as an ascerbic observer, she finds the fact that this motion was passed by 1% of the Greens membership ridiculous, particularly as the party has clearly become a welcoming home for people whose chief interest appears to be Palestine rather than the environment, the raison d’être of the party, having quadrupled its membership in a very short space of time.

The Greens are led by a man who is not a MP, and has just failed to become one; a man with a chequered past, a history of some frankly dubious claims, and an assumed name. None of that is good, but worse is that although he aspires to leadership, when it came to the opportunity actually to show some, he dodged it. Like Macavity the cat in the poem by T S Eliot:

Macavity, Macavity, there’s no one like Macavity,
He’s broken every human law, he breaks the law of gravity.
His powers of levitation would make a fakir stare,
And when you reach the scene of crime—Macavity’s not there!
You may seek him in the basement, you may look up in the air—
But I tell you once and once again, Macavity’s not there!

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 We start our extensive review of the week’s rancid rags in New York with actor Jeremy Strong at the London premiere of The Social Reckoning, (the sequel to The Social Network), wearing Loro Piana.

Oh, for Goodness Sake. This is rainwear, worn with plum coloured shoes. You could buy this at any camping shop for a fraction of the price. And it would still not be suitable for a premiere.

We are now at the Opening Gala of the New York City Ballet, where we meet actor Nicole Ari Parker, wearing Victor de Souzany.

If Scarlett O’Hara went to a fancy dress party as a meringue with very hairy pubes, this is what she would look like.

Now we are at a publicity event for Sense and Sensibility (which is very good) and one of its stars, Daisy Edgar Jones, wearing Dilara Findikoglu.

It is a corset worn as a dress. Instead of under it. WTF particularly dislikes the labial-lappage. Did she nick it from the set? Ms Elinor Dashwood would only have been seen dressed like this by her mother, her sisters, the servants, and – spoiler alert (!) – by Mr Edward Ferrars. After their marriage, of course.

The rest of our selection comes from Paris Fashion Week, where utter nonsense was in abundance. First off is the ubiquitous presenter and former model, Heidi Klum, wearing Christian Louboutin Womenswear.

Heidi has been shrinkwrapped. Only they forgot to remove her belt before starting the process. The jacket is a surprise.

Celebrity son Jaden Smith, also wearing Louboutin. 

Jaden gets on WTF’s nerves as he appears to be pointless. He is now bringing his pointlessness to design, having been hired by M Louboutin. He seems to be showcasing his wares in an outfit that is a cross between a display case and a packhorse.

Next, actor Chloë Grace Moretz, wearing Louis Vuitton.

First, WTF hates a see-through trouser almost above all things. And second, what the actual fuck is that thing around her neck and torso? It is like a wintry garden with the lawn swept clear of snow, with a blue ruff.

This is actor Isabelle Huppert, wearing Balenciaga. Scroll down slowly….. then yelp.

Yeti couture …….

Newlywed singer, Dua Lipa, wearing Chanel.

Wait, sorry, what? At first sight, these are nipples with eyebrows. 

On a closer look, these are the beady eyes of a secretary bird.

And finally, here is the one of the worst things WTF ever did see in her life. And she has seen some stuff. Here is model Coco Rocha wearing Kevin Germanier. Be careful now. Have a brown paper bag nearby to breathe into….

AAAAAAAAAAAARGHHHHH. What is going on here? Are those supposed to be mouldy labia? And why is that green colour, also featured on the bodice, the colour of green slime on a pond (picture courtesy of WTF aficionado Rona from Hackney, who brought the slime simile to WTF’s attention)? Yurgle.

This week’s It’s Got to Go comes from WTF aficionado WTF from Islington who is aghast that over half the states in America still have capital punishment, and that many of them use a lethal injection to put someone to death. Except that in the case of Tennessee, the land that time forgot, not one but two lethal injections proved not to be lethal at all. The recipient, Christa Pike, who is 50, had been on Death Row FOR 32 YEARS, after being found guilty of murder when she was 18. And now she is recovering in hospital while the State deliberates on whether to have another go.

Pike’s lawyers warned both Tennessee’s Courts and the Governor that she had very small veins, which would make it harder to inject her, but they did not listen. Medical ethics forbid doctors to take part in this obscene ritual, but Dr Mark Fowler was still happy to step in. Something went wrong, just as it did with the same doctor and a prisoner called Tony Carruthers in May this year, when Fowler struggled to find a vein and the whole thing got called off. Whether the Pike debacle was because of a vein problem, or that the drug used was date-expired, or some other reason, is unclear. This is barbaric. This is disgusting. It’s Got To Go.

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Keep sending in your excellent suggestions for It’s Got to Go, and do not stint on the comments either. Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x