WTF America the Not-So-Beautiful Special

Hallo Readers,

America is quite convinced that it is the Greatest Democracy in the World. Which is a joke. Let us start with the fact that in this month alone, eight people were shot dead in various massage parlours in Atlanta, Georgia and ten others were shot dead in a grocery store in Boulder, Colorado. In both cases by young men with obvious mental health issues, and in the case of the one in Colorado, with a previous conviction for violence, who were nevertheless able to get their hands on an assault rifle and let rip. As a Colorado state representative observed on TV, ‘this guy could buy a gun in ten minutes, but if he needed an appointment with a psychiatrist, it would have taken him two months to get one’. Living in the Greatest Democracy in the World, even if it were, which is it isn’t, is not worth a damn if you cannot work in a massage parlour, or pop down to the local store, without getting a bullet in your brain from a total stranger on the rampage. The Declaration of Independence famously begins ‘We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their creator with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness’. But it is always the unalienable right to possess a gun which trumps the unalienable right to life. This week, Republicans voiced their usual mealy-mouthed regrets and offered up ‘thoughts and prayers’, before attacking anyone who dared to suggest that they should instead start regulating the sale of deadly weapons, a sentiment dismissed by Senator Ted Cruz as ‘theatre’. It is of course utterly irrelevant that Cruz has received campaign contributions from the NRA and other gun-toting madmen to the tune of more than $300,000. And that he hopes to run for President in 2024.

Meanwhile, a large number of Republican-controlled states are busy trying to make it harder for black people, and brown people, and anyone who might be vaguely liberal, to vote. Voting is, you might think, a cornerstone of democracy. Unless you happen to be black, or brown, or vaguely liberal in a GOP-controlled state, in which case you will be made to scramble through hoops you did not even know existed. WTF is old enough to remember when a large number of states in the Greatest Democracy in the World (some of them controlled by Democrats), not only denied black people the right to vote, but made them sit at the back of the bus, and the back of the diner, and opposed integration in schools. And decades later, those states are still trying to make it harder for citizens to vote because they know that unless they do, there will be more places like Georgia which replaced its two venal, lickspittle, Republican senators with a black pastor and a Jew, both Democrats, thus tipping the balance of the Senate to Joe Biden.

Oh and do not get me started on the fact that over 73 million voters voted for a man who was ignorant, racist, useless, lazy, denied science and oversaw the death of 540,000 people. And then maintained that he had won, even though the other guy got 7 million more votes than their guy.

Joe Biden, who is a good man, likes to tell us that ‘there is nothing America cannot do when we put our minds to it’. Yes, they have put men on the moon and sent a spaceship to Mars. But maybe they should be less concerned about  Mars and more concerned about Minneapolis, Missouri and Mississippi.

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We start our survey of the week’s awful attire with former TOWIE person Yazmin Oukhellou in Dubai, (DUBAI!!!!!!) wearing Pretty Little Thing.

WTF aficionado Louise from Gloucestershire was aghast by Yazmin’s attire, noting that ‘instead of a bun in the oven, she has two buns up top’. WTF is of the view that those things appended to Yazmin’s chest are more like a couple of cottage loaves, but whatever they are, they should not be paraded around Dubai, or, for that matter, anywhere else.

Next up, we have American entrepreneur and Netflix reality star of the show Bling Empire, Christine Chiu.

Christine owns a string of plastic surgery clinics, and is married to a plastic surgeon, which might come in handy where you are feeling a bit saggy around the jawline. On the evidence of this photo, though, she should divorce him and take up with a stylist instead. Not only is she wearing a see-through beach coverup, but she appears to have the top half of an earthenware jar around her waist. Did she get stuck in one and had to be broken out of it?

This is actress Ashley Benson, wearing Gianbattista Valli.

This is obviously a week for silly things added on to fairly ordinary outfits to make them look silly. In Ashley’s case, what appears to be a flying saucer appended to her sports bra. As for the trewsies, they seem to have been designed for a taller person.

Now we have pointless celebrity Kourtney Kardashian out with her beau, musician and music producer Travis Barker. Travis looks a mess. Kourt’s cardie is by Victoria Beckham and is rather nice, but the pleather trousers are an offence against humanity.

Is this a case of vag ventilation? Or was it worn in homage to Balaclava Man in Line of Duty?

We now encounter actress Florence Pugh, wearing Louis Vuitton.

WTF has no idea what this supposed to be, but it is not good. There is spilth tumbling out of the bodice forming a second set of tits, and the skirt is downright ugly, like acrylic floor tiling in an industrial kitchen.

To LA and award-winning rapper Megan Thee Stallion, wearing Christian Siriano.

WTF can only assume that Meghan was going to a fancy dress party dressed as a peek-a-boo poodle.

Finally, be prepared to be horrified by what model Winnie Harlow is wearing while out and about in Beverley Hills

Let us leave aside the fact that she is wearing a deckchair and is carrying what is possibly the ugliest Chanel bag in the history of bags.  The bag is called Sand By the Sea and costs £4,500, but it would be more aptly named Ripoff By Chanel. No, WTF is more concerned by the fact that Winnie is not wearing a skirt, not even at all. If ever there was a Minge Moment waiting to happen, here it is walking along Santa Monica Drive. And Winnie is not alone. This appalling trend was also seen last month on model Kara del Toro, where it looked even worse.

First of all, she is wearing a bra. WTF will say it again – a bra is not a top. A bra is worn under a top.  This one is also showing off two-tone tits and two-tone tits are a Bad Thing. Period. Second, Kara’s fake tan is positively ludicrous. And third, for the reasons set out above, that is not a skirt. Both of these ladies look as if they are auditioning for a feminist remake of Tarzan……

This week’s It’s Got to Go comes from WTF aficionado Gita from Hong Kong, who has taken great exception to the new Burberry range, which is basically the usual lairy pattern with the word LOVE painted on it. Yours for £££££££££. 

Gita is unimpressed and says  ‘Not only was this now ubiquitous print horrid in the first place, but they now expect you to pay £500 for one daubed with paint where you can’t even see the paint’. She’s right. It’s Got To Go.

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Keep those comments coming in as WTF just loves them like anything. And your suggestions for It’s Got To Go of late have been bang on the money. Let us meet again next Friday. Be good and stay safe. x

 

 

 

 

 

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