WTF eye-opener special

Apologies to those subscribers who received a premature notification of WTF on Wednesday. WTF was so reeling from the shock of the Royal Family all dressing well for the whole sequence of Jubilee events that she accidentally pressed the “publish” button. Who knew? Even Princess Anne looked passable whereas usually she appears to have raided the charity clothing bin in the High Street.

 First up – Elizabeth Banks, hot young actress.

Elizabeth is wearing a black babygro with mesh inserts. You don’t see those in Mothercare. I don’t even want to think how you go to the loo wearing a black babygro either with or without mesh inserts. Just plain disturbing.

Let us move quickly on to Tali Lennox.

On seeing this, a friend of mine remarked “now I know what happened to the 1970s fluffy white rug that my mother used to plonk me on so that she could photograph me in frilly dresses with nasty hats…” Why Tali would want to go to the Glamour Awards wearing the 1970s fluffy white rug complete with gold belt and organza collar, WTF cannot say. But let us not forget that Tali’s mother Annie went prancing around the stage at the Queen’s Jubilee Concert sporting a pair of wings and singing “there must be an angel (playing with my heart)”. Clearly the apple does not fall far from the tree.

WTF has been accused of misogyny. This is wrong. WTF is not against women but against women in bad clothes. And men in bad clothes, like Will Young here.

What is it with British men and shins? The moment the temperature climbs over 60 degrees farenheit, British men reach for the mankiest pair of shorts they can find (either that or 3/4 length trousers which are yet more heinous) and head outside to assault the senses of British womenfolk. And they have no idea about footwear. Grey socks? Polished sneakers? Mind you, it is difficult to imagine what footwear could be appropriate for this combo of garish stripes and tartan, although a couple of breeze blocks would be no more than Will deserves for wearing it at all. Furthermore, no adult male should ever wear shorts and a sweater unless he is a scoutmaster.

By the way, why wasn’t Will singing at the Queen’s Jubilee concert? Better him than  Cliff bloody Richard. Sir Cliff must be detained at home under the Senior Stars Who Should Stay Indoors Act. Ditto Sir Elton and Sir Paul….. but I digress.

Here is Brooke Hogan, American “singer” “actress” and “television personality”, not to mention daughter of Hulk Hogan, the well known wrestling superstar. WTF had better not to be too mean about Brooke or her dad will come round.

 I am sure that Brooke is a lovely girl, but here she is dressing as if she is trying to put the “ho” into “Hogan”.  Brooke – next time you need less tan, some middle and more skirt.

Next up, Donatella Versace.

There is something fundamentally disconcerting about a frilly evening gown with gold accented moulded tits worn by someone with arms like a builder’s navvy. Meanwhile, here’s a question. Has anyone ever seen Donatella  and Steve Tyler in the same room? Just asking…

And finally, welcome to another edition of “Designers Who Need to See A Doctor”, this week featuring Betsey Johnson. As it turns out, Betsey also needs to see a lawyer and an accountant as her clothing business has just gone gurgling down the pan. Is it any surprise when the designer goes out and about arrayed like this?

Betsey is around 70 years old, but seems to have been moonlighting as a chorus girl in a travelling production of West Side Story. The reason she is being dragged along like that is that the hand belongs to her stage manager and she is late for the Second Act (I like to be in America ♪♪♪). You’d have a hell of a job dancing in those shoes. And the last time WTF saw hair like that, it was on Worzel Gummidge.

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3 Responses to WTF eye-opener special

  1. Sal says:

    Yet another triumphant WTF. Betsey Johnson’s arms remind me of those disappointing chicken wings; the ones that don’t have any meat on them. More worrying than that, is the fact that the bloke in the black suit behind her is wearing (drum roll please) loafers and no socks. Maybe he should have a word with Will.

  2. zeejonesartist
    Zee says:

    I’t’s a hard call between Donatella and Betsy Johnson on tha arm front!!!, but I think ……I should thank you for calling our attention to it.

  3. naomi says:

    And why are the trophies at the Movie Awards reduced to black buckets of golden popcorn? There are lots of them lined up at the back. The industry must indeed be in a parlous state.

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