Selection of images of fashion disasters

Hallo Readers,

WTF makes no apologies in returning to the subject of the appointment, or possible non-appointment, of Brett Kavanaugh as the ninth member of the Supreme Court. Yes it is about American politics and the vileness that is America’s 45th President, but that is not the real story. It is about how, in the end, that women are still fighting to be heard, how the subject of sexual assault is still so misunderstood. That is why so many people on both sides of the Atlantic are upset about the way that Christine Blasey Ford and the other accusers have been treated and why that distress is so visceral. And that is why the sight of two women victims of sexual assault shouting at a cowering, abject, Senator Jeff Flake in an elevator at the Capitol last Friday was so moving. Because it is, ultimately, a story about all of us, not just three women who encountered Kavanaugh as a teenager three decades ago.

The Republican members of the Senate Judiciary Committee listened to Ford tell her story and claimed to find her evidence ‘compelling’. But not compelling enough to believe her when she said that she was 100% sure that it was Kavanaugh who attacked her whilst laughing loudly with his watching friend. They concluded that something happened to her, but it was not him it happened with. She was ‘mixed-up’. They could not possibly destroy a man’s life because of this uncorroborated allegation. The fact that they did not subpoena the other person in the room and question him meant that there could be no corroboration. It is like killing your parents and then pleading for pity because you are an orphan. Don’t call the witness to see how credible he might or might not be. Just blame a woman for being ‘confused’, and let this man get a life-time appointment because he worked so hard for it and he deserves it. Not to mention the distress caused to his lovely kids and his lovely wife. The family dog is probably off his food as well. Oh, and Kavanaugh is going to vote to set abortion and gay rights and native American rights back 50 years. Then there was the rigged FBI investigation”. Despite the evidence that Kavanaugh was a nasty drunk, the White House instructed them not to ask college friends about his drinking. Because if they did, they might find evidence that he had lied when he said he didn’t drink to excess and even Trump conceded that proof of perjury would scupper the appointment. They could talk to someone who alleged Kavanaugh had flashed at her, but not to her twenty friends and colleagues who begged to be interviewed. They were told to wrap it all up within seven days. They did it in five, and one hundred senators have been given twenty-four hours to read the one copy of their report before voting.

Who cares if women are protesting outside? Who cares if 1,200 law professors from the top law schools have raised doubts about his character and temperament? Who  cares if he ranted and raved like a lunatic at the Hearing and blamed the Democrats for a witch hunt against him? (He now says he was speaking as a dad, father and son. Er, no – he was an interviewee). Who cares if he perjured himself? Who cares if professionals know that it can take years for people to admit sexual abuse? Who cares if there is evidence that many people don’t remember all the details of the attack, even though they damn well know who attacked them? Who cares if this ‘very fine woman’ (© Donald J. Trump) had this terrible experience – I mean, she’s OK, right? She went on to be a professor! She’s married! She’s being manipulated. So she is simultaneously credible and unreliable, a very fine woman and a stooge. Hey, we listened right? We got a report, right? And now we can get on with doing what we were always going to do in the first place. And this afternoon, UK time, that is probably exactly what they are going to do. Shame on the Republicans. Shame on any Democrats who put their re-election prospects in conservative states against principle (but credit to Senator Heidi Heitkamp who did not). The whole thing is shameful and it leaves women feeling disrespected and ignored. And that is a very painful feeling.

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We start our review of the week’s clothing crapulence with the Boudicca de nos jours,  Theresa May, in Birmingham wearing Paule Ka.

Admittedly the Tory Party is in a parlous state, but was it really necessary for Mrs Maybe to dress like a surgeon in the operating theatre? 

Nurse! Pass me the scalpel, stat! I need to remove Mr Johnson’s goolies. Don’t bother with the anaesthetic…..’

This is actress Michelle Williams in LA at the premiere of her new movie, Venom, wearing Louis Vuitton. It’s got Tom Hardy in it. Just saying….

The shirt is great, but the combination with the cropped blond hair, the shorts and the bootees resembling black socks, is very Hitler Youth. You half expect her to start belting out Tomorrow Belongs To Me from Cabaret.

Talking of black socks, here is actor Robert Pattinson in New York, wearing Dior Homme.

If Dennis the Menace went to a fancy dress party as an Amish, this is what he would look like. The socks!!!! And there is more. From the front, those shoes looks like buffed-up brogues. But they are ponced-up, crocodile sneakers.

London calling  – meet actress Zawe Ashton at the premiere of  ‘A Star is Born’ wearing Isa Arfen.

She looks like a collapsed marquee in yoga pants and heels.

Here we are in Las Vegas with former baseball superstar Alex Rodriguez and his inamorata,  Jennifer Lopez,  both wearing Tom Ford.

Not even a tall, manly man like ARod can get away with looking like a giant stick of candy floss. JLo is wearing a tinfoil condom and a ridiculous coat like an extra from The Jungle Book.  More ridiculous still, it costs £6,800. And it has sold out.

To Paris Fashion Week, where we encounter actress Sophie Turner wearing Jonathan Simkhai and her fiancé, actor and singer Joe Jonas, wearing Ermenegildo Zegna.  They are out for lunch – literally.

These two are like a pair of perambulating body parts. She is showing more chest than diners expect to see over a lunchtime plate of paté de foie gras and a glass of Sauternes, while his trousers, mismatched with his jacket, have succumbed to the current malaise affecting gentlemen’s leg wear, to whit, elephant vagina syndrome. And they have gone matchy-matchy, although not to each other. She has the white bag and shoes combo last seen in 1985 and he has matched his laces to his trewsies. Both their stylists need a slap, a P45 and another slap.

Still in Paris, here is rapper Cardi B wearing Mugler.

Wossis? She has a pair of pomegranates stuck to her chest under a jacket seemingly designed for a larger person. Her translucent shaper shorts feature a ribbon in what appears to be an unnecessary position, and some artfully-frayed threads like the last remnants of an exploded blackbird.

This week’s It’s Got to Go comes from WTF Aficionados Gerry and John from Regent’s Park, Lucy from Islington, and Ayesha from Stepney, all of whom are unhappy about Arsenal manager’s Unai Emery‘s hair. 

No, sorry. The lads are playing better, although the defence is still pants, but his hair is greasy. And this isn’t a Spanish thing, this is a greasy thing. And It (but not him) Has Got to Go.

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. You sent in some excellent comments and some tip-top suggestions for It’s Got To GoKeep WTF smiling by doing the same with knobs on this week. Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x

4 responses to “WTF Who Cares Special?”

  1. I was privileged to witness the fetching Theresa May boogie to ABBA’s The Dancing Queen and I feel compelled to say that she can take me to the Prom whenever she likes. If my bottom was in England right now I’d beg her to sign it. With those moves she will solve Brexit and the appalling Boris will be put to the sword in short order. In passing, Ms M Williams looks very gorgeous. I am tempted to say that her legs are wonderful but I don’t want to sound like Harvey Weinstein.

  2. Zawe Ashton is quite clearly dressed by Werthers Originals. She is the 21st Century version of that Trebor Mints puppet. As for Jennifer Lopez – Bet Lynch wants her coat back.

  3. An Arsenil manager, greasy? Surely not….

  4. Re Robert Pattinson: don’t chickens have legs like that? Annie Lowe

    Sent from my iPad

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