wtffashionshark

Hallo Readers,

In 2013, Jeremy Corbyn, then a back bencher with no thought of higher office, made a speech in support of the representative of the Palestinian Authority whose words had been recorded at an earlier meeting by ‘the thankfully silent Zionists who were in the audience and then came up and berated him afterwards for what he’s said’. Apparently, the aforementioned Zionists had misunderstood what had been said. So, said Corbyn to this particular meeting, attended, by the way, by a vicar who thinks that the Israelis were behind 9/11,

‘Two problems. One is they don’t want to study history, and secondly, having lived in this country for a very long time, probably all their lives, they don’t understand English irony either.’

Let us put aside the fact that Corbyn has the sense of humour of a dormant potato. Let me, as a Jew, the daughter of a refugee mother who first came here in 1947 and a father born here to parents who arrived here in 1907 to escape the pogroms, explain exactly what is so offensive about what Corbyn said.

First, ‘Zionists’ here means ‘Jews’. Of course there are Zionists who are not Jews just as there are Jews who are not Zionists. But it is as clear as day that Corbyn was not talking about non-Jews because, if he had been, he would not have referred to their purported inability to understand ‘English irony’ despite ‘having lived in this country for a very long time’.  It means that ‘they’ are outsiders who are not part of this country.  ‘They’ do not belong here. ‘They’ do not get it. ‘They’ are not like us. Even Baroness Chakrabati’s infamous ‘investigation’ into Labour Anti-Semitism accepted that she had  “heard testimony and heard for myself first hand the way in which the word ‘Zionist’ has been used personally, abusively or as a euphemism for “Jew”‘. But of course Corbyn did not mean ‘Jew’ here. He never does.

Second, do you suppose for one minute that Corbyn would have used that language about someone whose heritage was African or Pakistani or Irish? Despite ‘having lived in this country for a very long time…they don’t understand English irony either’. And had the aforementioned ethnic minority persons then objected to his use of language and the sentiments behind it, would they have had their arguments rejected as ‘smears’ and ‘conspiracies’ ? You know damn well that they would not.

Third, this seems to be happening just a little too often to be a coincidence, don’t you think? One may be regarded as a misfortune. Twice looks like carelessness. Time and time again looks like either an inability to understand or downright hostility.

And fourth, when you have the enthusiastic support of David Duke, former Grand Leader of the Ku Klux Klan (also a big supporter of Donald Trump), and Nick Griffin (former head of the BNP) for your comments about Jews, you have probably got it  wrong. Look at his other supporters. Look at the guy who tweeted this week ‘Joined the Labour Party today. Why? When an honest, decent, compassionate man like JC is villified by an unholy alliance of the right-wing press, the jewish lobby and backstabbers like Berger, Umunna and Watson, time for people to make their voice heard’. The Jewish lobby. You know, those Jewish, Globalist, Blairite, bankers with no sense of British irony. So that’s it, Readers. Corbyn and I are done. 

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We start our non-English ironic review of the week’s sartorial sluice, with model Hailey Baldwin and her fiancé, singer Justin Bieber.

Hailey and Justin are soon to become one in the eyes of God, and it seems that they already have, adopting identical blond buns like his’n’hers continental breakfasts.

As these two go through life together, let us hope that their relationship is closer than the one Justin’s shorts have with his waist. How hard is it to keep your shorts up? 

To the Venice Film Festival and model Izabel Goulart, wearing Philisophy di Lorenzo Serafini.

This is mostly the usual yawn-making sheer stuff, but in this case unaccountably topped off with a puritan ruff as if Rembrandt had been transported into the tawdry world of the 21st century nonsense that is the fashion industry.

This is actress and celebrity daughter, Rumer Willis, wearing August Getty Atelier.

Is she sleepwalking, like a boudoir-clad Lady Macbeth? She must have been asleep when she bought or borrowed this ensemble because it is silly and it does not to fit her anywhere – the sleeves are too long, the trousers are too tight, the sandals are too big and the bralet is too small. Mathematics are not WTF’s strong suit, but you would think that, just on the law of averages, Rumer would have got one of them right.

To the iHeart Radio MMVA Awards in Toronto and singer Meghan Trainor, wearing The Blonds.

Meghan is wearing the sort of bra Rigby & Peller reserve for formidably upholstered dowagers, whilst her jacket looks like something Robinson Crusoe wore after a couple of years cast ashore on the desert island.

Singer Bebe Rexha, was in Toronto as well,  also wearing The Blonds.

Bebe is dressed as a trapeze artist doing a waitressing shift in the circus café. If it is cold enough for boots, then it is surely not warm enough for a bejewelled leotard with a bodice as ill-suited to its task as Theresa May is to African dancing.

To the BET Black Girls Rock! Awards in New Jersey and singer Janet Jackson, wearing Christian Siriano.

The dress is lovely, despite the studded harness, but why does she have a giant turd on her head? 

Next we have actor Bazaar Royale and his wife, former model and founder of the event, Beverly Bond.

Here is another happy couple mirroring each other (in this case literally) as they strive to preserve a lifetime of connubial bliss. Beverly’s décolletage is less a tit window and more the whole shop frontage of Saks Fifth Avenue. As for her spouse, he reminds WTF of the late perennial election candidate, Screaming Lord Sutch, whilst his shoes are inspired by Coco the Clown.

Finally, here is singer Mary J Blige in Roberto Cavalli.

It is of course supremely vulgar because Cavalli is the quintessence of vulgarity, including the inevitable threat of an imminent minge moment, as per bloody usual. The top is adorned by a tit tiger-lily and the polo neck top makes Mary’s head appear to have been plonked on from someone else’s body.

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Keep sending in your top comments and your excellent suggestions for It’s Got To Go. Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x