wtffashionshark

Hallo Readers,

WTF never knew that onanism with an ornamental plant was an actual thing, whether with or without others present. It certainly gives a new meaning to the word tosspot. Be that as it may, it is more evidence that Harvey Weinstein is a pig who should probably be in jail and should certainly be cast out of public life, a serial sex pest who harassed and sexually assaulted (and allegedly raped) women. Now we know his MO. Get a young woman up to your hotel suite on some pretext. Expose your fat, hairy body and a stiff schlong. Position yourself between the intimidated woman and the exit whilst demanding that she massage you or  watch you shower or pleasure you. Make it clear that a refusal will damage her career. If she tries to leave, chase her round the room, balls bouncing. Or she may agree because she is overwhelmed or does not think she can overpower your 6 foot, 300 lb. frame or is frightened for her career. Either way, for you it is not about sex but about power and humiliation. Weinstein liked humiliating people, whether by masturbating in front of women in private or by shouting and screaming at men in public. Now he is the one left humiliated – exposed by his accusers, abandoned by his wife, shunned by his colleagues, sacked by his company and denounced by one and all.  The grimmest joke is that the man now putting the whine into Weinstein insists that he ‘respects women’. Of course he doesn’t. He was just exercising his film mogul’s droit de seigneur. 

There has been a nauseating outbreak of faux-outrage on all sides, a political game of ‘your sex pest is worse than our sex pest’. The Republicans attacked the Democrats and their thespian supporters for not rushing to condemn Weinstein. Donna Karan indicated that women might have asked for it by the way they dress (and then swiftly recanted). The Clintons and the Obamas were certainly far too slow to speak out, as were some major stars and Bill Clinton is undoubtedly  as sleazy as fuck. But the complaints against them came from the same Republicans who staunchly defended Roger Ailes and Bill O’Reilly at Fox News against very similar allegations, the same Republicans whose President laughingly confessed on tape to sexually assaulting women and as regards whom 15 women have gone public. Donald Trump Jr, that boil on the bum of society, mocked Hillary Clinton’s links to Weinstein, despite his own father’s revolting conduct. One hardly knew whom to despise first.

But it was not just what did the Clintons and the Obamas know and when did they know it. Many people obviously did know about Weinstein. The assistants who set up the hotel meetings. The Ray Donovan types who hushed it up.  The Hollywood moguls and major movie stars who shrugged it off as ‘well, that’s Harvey’. The journalists who traded their silence about Weinstein in exchange for juicy stories about someone else. The lawyers who negotiated the pay-offs and the company officials who authorised them – in Weinstein’s case, eight of them. Eight! But still he carried on running the companies and everyone let him carry on.  Just as Fox News settled the claims against Ailes and O’Reilly. The industry regards women as commodities who are only there to flash their bits. It takes real guts to be a whistleblower in any workplace but even more where the giant corporations and the multi-millionaires have the means, the contacts and the power to crush troublemakers or to buy their silence, knowing who is deemed more valuable to the organisation. The first women to speak out this week opened the doors for others to do so. But to blame these women for having stayed silent for so long is just one more assault on them in a La La Land where sexism is rife, dinosaur are still in charge and many prefer to look the other way and cash the cheques.

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We start our review of the week’s atrocious attire at a Royal Wedding in Belgrade last Saturday. WTF loves a Royal Wedding, even where the Royals in question are no longer occupying a throne. Remember Prince Ernst of Hanover’s terrible trousers? Well here is another stinker, as worn by Danica Marikovic at her wedding to Prince Philip of Serbia. The bride is wearing Roksanda Illinic.

Love the crowns but that mishmash of a hospital gown and a sumo wrestler’s kimono is by Roksanda Illinic? Seriously? It simply does not fit anywhere, particularly around the chest, as this picture of the happy couple amply demonstrates.

Here is actress Ruth Wilson at the London Film Festival, wearing Dior.

Yes, those giant Dior panties are back again. Will they never go away? The sweater is cute but the skirt is just a kiddies’ shower curtain with a zip.

And now some shocking super-shockers from the BET Hip Hop Awards in Miami Beach, starting with chart-topping rapper Cardi B, wearing Lauren DeWitt.

This is not so much Lauren DeWitt as Lauren HalfWitt, not to mention Cardi HalfNipple. Plastic protuberances pretending to be tits, genitalia curtains, it is all there. Cardi B used to be an exotic dancer and sadly she is still dressing like one.

Next up, we have lyricist and singer Jazz Anderson, wearing Ashton Michael.

The pink is marking Breast Cancer Awareness, which is Good. But the combat jacket and frayed Robinson Crusoe trousers are Bad. Very Bad.

Nearly as bad as that completely baffling crotch, the female equivalent of elephant vagina syndrome as pioneered by designer Thom Browne.

Meet a rapper called Plies.

WTF has a sneaking admiration for the coat. But not when it is worn with that hat and without a shirt. And this is yet another example of terrible men’s trousers – these ones are folding everywhere with more angles than a Jenga Tower. 

Two hip hop artistes hit the Red Carpet in the same TLZ L’FEMME skirt. Well, I say skirt. First there was  Brianna Perry.

And then there was Premadonna in a white version with black lacing and $10,000 St Laurent boots.

That is not a skirt. That is an assortment of large laundry labels tied together with string. And just think of the indentations….

And finally we have a person called Keyshia Ka’oir, the fiancée of rapper Gucci Mane.  She is “wearing” Gucci and the same St Laurent boots. Careful now. You thought Brianna and Premadonna were bad? Wait until you clock this one….

For a Plus One, she seems a trifle underdressed. Why would you wear a chain mail bodysuit? Meanwhile, WTF is going to take a punt here and suggest that those tits are not natural. In fact they are the most unnatural-looking tits she has seen for quite a while, like a pair of Puerto Rican maracas separated from their handles.

This week’s It’s Got To Go comes from Martyn from Isleworth, West London, who is most exercised about Theresa May’s Vivienne Westwood jacket. 

Martyn’s point is that the jacket is a metaphor for the woman herself – confused and ill-fitting. It is as if she could not decide what shade to wear and so wore this Joseph-and-his-jacket-of-many-tweedy-colours so as to avoid making a decision. WTF agrees and would add that wearing Vivienne Westwood or those saucy shoes May favours or both is her way of trying to tell us that she may seem stupefyingly dull but actually she has this fun, wild side. Except that we know she doesn’t. And this jacket has Got To Go. 

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Please keep those comments coming in as WTF values them like anything.  And don’t forget your excellent suggestions for It’s Got To Go.  Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x