wtffashionshark

Hallo Readers,

On 4 October 1936, WTF’s father and three uncles went to Cable Street, a mile from their home in the East End of London, to stop Oswald Mosley’s Blackshirts from marching through the predominantly Jewish area. They were part of 20,000 people, Jews, communists, socialists and others. They were the 20th century version of the Antifa, even WTF’s Uncle Joe who was as mild as could be and was only seen to get angry on one other occasion. (This  was when his wife played the wrong hand at bridge. He promptly had a heart attack but happily he survived). 6,000 police officers were determined to let the 3,000 Blackshirts march and there was a pitched battle, with the demonstrators using rocks, sticks and chair legs as impromptu weapons until Mosley abandoned his attempt and went to Hyde Park instead. His bluff had been called and he and his party soon faded away. Should WTF’s father and uncles and the thousands of others have stayed at home and ignored the whole thing? Or should they have come out and stopped Mosley? Donald Trump would doubtless argue that whilst there were some very fine people on both sides, the alt-left was as bad as the alt-right and that there was wrong on many sides. Many sides.

As usual, Trump is wrong. No-one in a black shirt in 1936 was a very fine person. No one in a KKK hood and holding a flaming torch was a very fine person. No-one marching through Charlottesville, Virginia last Friday was a very fine person. Very fine people do not scream antisemitic and racist abuse. Very fine people do not believe in racial superiority. Very fine people do not set out to intimidate the local population by asserting that racial superiority. Very fine people do not drive their cars into crowds. If any very fine people did attend the march last week because they just wanted to protest about the removal of a Confederate statue, it would not have taken them long to discern the character and motives of their fellow-marchers. At which point, very fine people would have abandoned the march and gone home. 

There was violence from some of the counter-demonstrators. But they were there to protest against fascists and racists, some of whom were armed to the teeth and intent upon mayhem and one of whom killed and injured innocent people with a vehicle. For the original marchers, the statue of Robert E Lee was a pretext and not a cause. Lee never lived in Charlottesville or died in Charlottesville and had nothing to do with Charlottesville. The statue was erected in the 1920’s at a time when, despite the war, black people still were regarded as the underclass. Trump’s grasp of American history is, at best, shaky, as evidenced by his recent pronouncements on Andrew Jackson and General Pershing. For him, it is nothing to do with statues at all but about three things. He does not want to alienate his base by criticising them. He hates Antifa and lefties because they despise him. And he hates being told that he might have made a mistake, in this case not condemning Nazis on the day of the murder. For everyone else, the issue is simple. If it looks like a Nazi, sounds like a Nazi and carries a swastiska, it’s a fucking Nazi. And Nazis must always be opposed.

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Our review of the week’s crappy clothing is all about terrible trousers, starting with singer and WTF regular Kesha in New York wearing Nudie’s Rodeo Tailors.

It’s Kermit in a wig. There is simply no excuse for green hair unless you are either a mermaid, a frog or have gone mouldy. Or for  lime green silk trousers so tight that they fall squarely into the category of Call For The Canesten – particularly when worn with metallic platform boots like horses’  hooves.

Next up, we have model Chrissy Teigen at BeautyCon in LA.

WTF has had a soft spot for Chrissy ever since she was blocked by Donald Trump on Twitter for telling him that “no one likes you, LOL”. It was all going so well until the ankles. Lovely hair. Fab smile. Great top. And then the trousers pooling into the carpet like leaking sewage.  

Also present at BeautyCon was model Iskra Lawrence. 

PVC trousers, whether worn with or without a swimsuit, are not a good look on anyone. The effect here is of an oil slick in pixie boots. Iskra’s stylist deserves a slap, a P45 and another slap. 

Welcome back to another WTF stalwart, actor Alan Cumming.

Alan is dressed as a Breton little person. Who knows why? The footwear is particularly offensive.

We now encounter actress Bella Thorne . Bella is the one wearing the silly hat.

More bad hair. More very terrible trousers. Not that they are trousers. And more hooves. And WTF hates sunglasses in the dark almost above all things.

Here we are in Australia where the trousers are no better. Meet make-up guru Napoleon Perdis and his daughter, budding model Liana Perdis.

Clearly the apple does not fall far from the tree. Napoleon is dressed as a pervy preacher whilst Liana’s ensemble with suspender-trousers is sort of sexy-spacegirl-in-a-galactic-girlie-club.

What follows are not really trousers at all although they are very terrible. Those of a nervous disposition are advised to skip the final photographs or, at the very least, to have a sick bag handy and/or the number of a healthcare professional on speed-dial. We begin with mega-tattooed “glamour” model, current “starring” in Celebrity Big Brother, Jemma Lucy.

Jemma’s career is based upon appearing in raunchy reality programmes where she proceeds to copulate with whoever is on hand. As WTF aficionado Ruth remarked, “I’m surprised she hasn’t got bed sores”. Here is a full-on Minge Moment. And here is the rear – literally.

Of course – the obligatory arse cheeks encased in a greying net curtain. Just go away.

Former Spice Girl Mel B‘s outfit is just as bad, wearing Rocky Gathermole to the opening of the US Show America’s Got Talent, on which she is a judge.

This is a body stocking with a horseshoe vajazzle and tit tokens. You would only wear this if you wanted to Let The World Know You Are OK After Your Dirty Divorce Hit The Headlines. Most puzzling is the metal thing inside the horseshoe.

Is it a keyhole? A keyring?  Her house key? Whatever it is, it is should not be on display.

This week, it is not so much a case of It’s Got To Go as Don’t Go There. WTF aficionado Nicky from Highgate is upset about the Aparthaus Paradies, the hotel-from-hell in the Swiss mountain resort of Arosa and its manager, Frau Ruth Thomann, who put up the following sign.

When asked about the sign, Frau Thomann denied that she was antisemitic and claimed that the hotel has many Ultra-Orthodox Jews staying (not after this, it won’t) and there had been complaints from other guests that they did not shower prior to taking a dip. She admits that her words were ill-chosen and asserts that she had been “naive”. WTF feels safe in saying that there is some work to be done in improving the hotel’s Gemütlichkeit and that Frau Thomann should choose her words more carefully in future.

OK Readers, that’s your lot for this week. Please keep those comments coming in as WTF is still a bit nervous about being blown to smithereens and needs distracting. Do not neglect your excellent suggestions for It’s Got To Go either.  Let us meet again next Friday. Be good x